Waking Up to Reality
Before we take the necessary steps to improve our life, we must first acknowledge that whatever we have been doing has not been working out to our ultimate satisfaction. So we begin to examine some of our thoughts, feelings, emotions and actions in our everyday routine. Increasingly, many men of all ages and backgrounds are reviewing the merits of engaging in masturbation, one which we have been led to believe is healthy and beneficial on many levels. We have grown up in a world that has been reinforcing this idea for as long as we can remember. Let us recall that these messages have been coming at us from the external world into our minds from so-called important people like, our parents, teachers and psychologists. Therefore we took it for granted that these people must have known what they were saying since they seemed more knowledgeable and more powerful than us, and so we believed in them.
Then, one day, we inevitably begin to question society’s ideas and our elders’ influence on our lives. That brings us to the the genesis of the Nofap movement, where more and more men and women are waking up to the fact that the results that they have gotten from masturbation are completely contrary to those espoused by mainstream social programming. So let us take a closer look at how and why the Nofap path is truly the first step to regaining control over ourselves at the very deepest levels.
Fapping everyday leads to a lot of mistaken thoughts, feelings and actions. We all know how obsessive we can become with porn and searching for an ever more explosive orgasm. So we search and we search for even more explicit images until we realize that our behavior is becoming very dangerous to our health, both physically and psychologically. Sadly, too many of us come to this realization only to continue fapping to ever more extreme porn not knowing that we are walking down the darkest corridors of our egoic mind. Perhaps freaked out by our never-ending desire for more porn and masturbation, we take a good hard look in the mirror and admit to ourselves that our sexual impulses are out of control. Therefore, it becomes very apparent to us that both our mental and physical behaviors must change.
When we reach this “breaking point” where we truly want to change our thoughts, feelings and actions, we start on the nofap path. Nofap starts out seemingly like “the” answer we have always been looking for, I mean “superpowers”, confidence, more attention from the opposite sex and the list goes on. Yet once we beginning practicing nofap it gets really hard to maintain control over ourselves. We start and then relapse over and over again wondering why we cannot reach the long “streaks” that we have heard about so many others guys achieving. Then we might get frustrated and fall back to fapping all the time. We sincerely try to gain some semblance of control over our sexual desires but far too many of us feel overwhelmed by the urge to relapse.
There are many reasons why we relapse, some of the most obvious are these: lust, fear, stress, and pride. Let’s take a look at these factors one by one so that we can gain more insight into how they operate on our psychology.
Lust is number one not only because it is the most obvious but also because we, as a society, are completely awash in lustful images from television to movies, magazines and of course, the Internet! Lust is very dangerous because it takes what should be a beautiful and pure moment, like making love between to souls who truly love each other, into a crude, animalistic and mechanical act that turns every soul into an object of desire, which inevitably pollutes and destroys the purity of our own mind. How, you may ask? Simply stated, we are all one human family, like all the drops of water that form giant oceans, we are all interconnected. Therefore, if just one person is contaminating their hearts and minds with lust, it definitely ends up infecting all of us at deep and subtle levels. Thankfully, the answer to lust is chastity. Chastity is when we retain our sexual energy until the day we meet our beloved, at which time we may engage in the beauty of the sexual union, but we must never spill the seed (no ejaculation and no orgasm ever). The reason we must not spill the seed is because sexual union is actually a sacred act where we can truly gain insight into ourselves, create more intimacy between our beloved and heal our past psychological traumas. We achieve this by using the “fire” of sex and bringing the Christic light in our sexual energy up into our brains. This can only be done to its maximum potential when we are with the one person in the whole world who we really open our heart to.
Fear and sex go hand-in-hand. If you think about how nervous we got when we approached our first time being intimate with another person, you will surely recall how scared we were. Sex is a scary thing, we should all admit this because with that fear should come respect. Far too many of us treat sex so casually nowadays that the awesomeness of the act is lost amongst our ego, so much so that we enter into sexual relationships for “fun”. That certainly is not the point of sex. Sex must be respected and revered for the truly sacred act that it is. There is pain in the sumptuousness of sexual sensation, which should be a clue to us as to the huge potential for healing that lies in our sexual energy. Wherever there is pain, there is always the opportunity for growth, be it on the physical, emotional, psychological or the spiritual levels.
Our egoic fears cause relapse. For example, while we are retaining our sexual energy we begin to meet our ego for the first time and none of us are happy with what we see. Some of us run away and hide from these fears by fapping because they seem too much to take. What forms do these fears take in our own minds? How about the fear of facing our own sexuality and how we have been mistreating it for so long. Flat-lining is one such fear which might call our attention to the delicate balance at play between our masculine side and our feminine side. Many of us, myself included, during our first experience flat-lining, might wonder why we seem to have lost our attraction to the opposite sex creating fears about our own sexuality. But let’s not be fooled by our egos because falt-lining is actually a very healthy process in which our mind, heart and body are coming back into balance. Not only that, flat-lining means our chakras are harmonizing, giving us the opportunity to see women more clearly because we do NOT have to be attracted to EVERY “hot” woman! In fact, wanting to have sex with every beautiful woman is not healthy, but it is very extreme. These are all egoic fears and the point of going through the fear we face is to strengthen us spiritually so that we can continue to grow and correct more and more of our incorrect animalistic desires, thereby allowing us to view our world more with more clarity.
Stress is yet another element that works on our mind and gives us the chance to either transmute the problem with our sexual energy, or give into the ego pushing us to run away from our problems and into its hands through returning to masturbation. The next time you face a stressful situation, do your best to take the opportunity to really see where that resistance is coming from because, if you look deeply, I believe you will see that it has everything to do with your ego not wanting to bend and change with whatever circumstance your are experiencing. In fact, it is worth noting that the whole point of nofap (semen retention) is to transmute our sexual energy through the facing of stressful situations, thereby allowing our sexual energy to empower us to make great changes in our thoughts, feelings and emotions.
Pride is the mother of all egoic tricks because it is forever convincing us that we are in control of our selves. This illusion is very damaging though because it gives us all a very false sense of security thinking that we are better, more intelligent and more powerful than others. It is most destructive on the nofap path because, as we start to go further down our path, our pride leads us to believing we can control our sexual energy; that somehow we have even mastered this all-powerful energy coming from God. It has happened to me and many others, after a streak of 7 or 8 months of retaining our sexual energy our pride begins to tell us we can edge a little because, after all, we have been so good and we can now control anything. However, we discover right away that we still have no control when we see how easily edging turns into full blown fapping and ejaculation. This is actually where the fear of sex should stop us from thinking we can totally master this energy after so little time practicing. What’s more, we should embody the opposite of pride, which is humility. Being modest gives us the awareness that we are no better than others and fosters more respect for our incredibly powerful sexual energy.
Why Nofap Works
Nofap works because we have decided to empower ourselves! We have decided that our repetitive behaviors, thinking and feelings have become “outdated” for us. So it is essentially a matter choice, us choosing to change! And there is no force in all the universe more transformative than our sacred sexual energy. Let’s remember that this sublime energy between our legs is responsible for ALL of creation, everywhere! Therefore once we begin to retain our sexual energy, by giving up PMO, we start harnessing all that power to create the best versions of ourselves.
Perhaps many people do not realize this, but within our semen, as men, and the ovum for women, lies the “light” of Christ. I am not referring to the master who lived 2000 years ago, I am actually talking about the energy that exists everywhere all the time that greats like Jesus, Mohammed, Moses and others were able to crystallize in their every thought, feeling and action. When we allow this energy to build up in our hearts, minds and bodies, we begin down the path of the enlightened “spiritual warrior”. Therefore nofap is based 100% on using our sexual energy to purify our beings. The purification process is painful and challenging and nobody enjoys seeing the ugliness of their own actions and thoughts, but we must allow this process to unfold by continuing to retain our sexual energy.
With all the many “superpowers” of course comes the responsibility to use them wisely. So nofap is encouraging us to face our egoic self with love and compassion so that we can change those parts of ourselves that require changing and amplify the parts that have always been working for us. How does this occur? Basically the unfolding of our true selves comes from the “light” within our sexual energy, which clears away the darkness within, which gives us every opportunity to face our fears and overcome the hurdles in life because we now know that nothing can stop us from achieving whatever goal we set for ourselves.
In conclusion, nofap works so well because we are armed with knowledge of self. The process of facing all our internal and external fears molds us into fearless soldiers of our own truth. Once we know who we are deep down, nothing and nobody can ever stop us from reaching the highest of heights! Good luck to all my brothers and sisters working so hard to improve themselves so that we can all make our individual worlds better, which is only helping to make the whole world a better place to live in.